‘Fire In The Hole”: Male Bonding?

Ratatat! Ratatat! Ratatat! Bang! Bang! Ratatat…and on and on for the ‘longest brief moment’. And loud! Oh, was it loud!

The old man next door came out of his house as the police arrived. At the same time, my sister burst into my bedroom like a SWAT officer looking for the perps.

She found them, two perps, 16 and 21, my future brother-in-law, pending her inquisition, and me, quietly having a nervous laugh at the ruckus we caused. A few long strips of firecrackers tossed out the bedroom window into the neighbor’s yard on a hot summer night, and a sister’s wrath, can do that, make you nervous, and laugh.

“Sounded like gunfire”, the old man told the officers.

In 1963 shootings were extremely rare. No, this was just a case of old-fashion ‘male bonding*’, not to be confused with ‘boys will be boys’.

“Am I wrong”, as Seinfeld’s George Costanza would often ask

* male bonding or male friendship is the formation of close personal relationships, and patterns of friendship or cooperation between males. (Wikipedia)

Generally, male bonding occurs when there’s some common goal to be achieved by struggling together: surviving a challenge, winning a game, meeting a target, something that brings two or more men together in achieving and strengthening a relationship. Surviving the verbal blows of an enraged sister might be a good example.

Then, there’s the action of professional golfer, Tiger Woods, who made news this week when cameras caught him passing a female hygiene product to a fellow competitor whom he had just out driven, suggesting that his foe hit like a girl, weak. They were bonding, according to the apologetic Tiger.

Was it innocent? Probably. Funny? Not really, at least not for public consumption. ‘Male bonding’? No, it was crass, locker room stuff. Even the firecracker affair rose to a higher level.

As to that episode, I think the ‘perps’ learned a lesson in growing up. My future BIL and I did bond and had a good summer. My sister married him and he’s done well by her for 58 years.

What’s your take on Tiger’s behavior, and your favorite memory of bonding? Surely, you have one. All stories are welcome.

Steve (021923)

To my. sister & brother-in-law. you’ve ‘bonded’ well

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srbottch

Retired in 2013 after 5 years as an elementary school teacher and 40 years as a sales representative to begin anew as a school crossing guard. SMy essays/stories are a way to communicate through the telling of personal experiences. One reader said about my blog stories, "...these are like a cold sip during a marathon run, simple, real life events". Another offered about my blog, “it brings some sense of normalcy not easily found in the modern world.”

33 thoughts on “‘Fire In The Hole”: Male Bonding?”

  1. I’d think there should be more of the male bonding. It’s vital to the health of every human. The fact you could bond with a future BIL, meant your sister had a better chance of a good relationship with the new husband. It’s not a small thing.

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    1. I wanted to add, I watched Tiger’s interview yesterday at the Genesis Invitation, and noticed he kept rambling and rambling. He has come back from adversity and is still very appreciated by his fellow competitors. However, I think he really needs some balance in his life, just my opinion. I think, behind every great man is a great women.

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  8. I saw the headlines about Tiger’s latest incident but I could not be bothered to read the details. Boys and firecrackers! My brother had a few firecracker bonding moments, too. He loved to put them into a metal can or an old cake pan to make it sound “real”.

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  11. Hi Steve, the feature of this post that caught my attention first was that your friend became your BIL. How lovely. I never lived in any town or city long enough to build such enduring friendships. My older son and his friends caught a jar of grasshoppers and stowed them under his bed. They escaped, of course, and we had ‘singing’ grasshoppers in our house for years afterwards. So funny!

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    1. Robbie, he was my sister’s beau who spent a summer with our family. She met him at college and they married after a a few years of courting. They’ve been together 58 years.

      I bet your son hasn’t forgotten that and still considers the friends. Funny story. Thanks for commenting.

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